When her husband said he was going on a business trip, she was not the least bit suspicious as he took work trips “several times a year.” However, days after he returned, he called his wife from work in a panic, asking if he’d left his debit card at home.
The Mumsnet user wasn’t able to locate it at home, so she decided to phone the hotel and see if they’d found anything. However, when she connected with a hotel receptionist, before she could ask her question, she was greeted with:
“[O]h mrs X you must be calling about your necklace, we found it in the bathroom how lucky for you it would have been such a shame to lose such lovely pearls!”
Her heart sank and her mind “went sort of numb.” The necklace wasn’t hers. She asked for the receptionist to send the pearls to the house so she could investigate more.Tenth Muse Photography/Flickr
When they arrived, user Foolmeoncefoolmetwice described them as “a beautiful string of real pearls, […] like something a queen would wear.” They’d been sitting at the bottom of her dresser drawer for nearly a month until she wrote on the forum:
I haven’t said a word about it to him. Whenever I think about it I get all dizzy and feel I might be sick but I don’t know why, it’s been a long time since I’ve had any suspicions about him. I don’t know if I want to know but it’s making me crazy. I also don’t know if I could break up our family, the thought makes me want to vomit.
She and her husband had previously worked through him “kissing another woman,” as well as the incident where “he sent some flirty texts to a colleagues.” She brushed off the infidelities, saying “it was years ago.”
Mumsnet users urged Foolmeoncefoolmetwice to recognize the situation for what it was:Screenshot/Mumsnet Screenshot/Mumsnet
Others tried to rationalize the situation:Screenshot/Mumsnet
However, Foolmeoncefoolmetwice kept her fellow Mumsnet users updated as her anger, and subsequently courage, grew stronger.
While the user was initially hesitant to investigate the situation further because of her and her husband’s “comfortable life together,” the stress of ignoring his sketchiness had caused her to have “crippling headaches.”
Therefore, she began her investigation with their expenses. Her husband mentioned that because of recent bills, they would have to “tighten their belts.”
This explanation didn’t seem sound to her. After rifling through her husband’s drawers while he was sleeping at a friends, she found “disgusting” things in his drawer:
The other woman’s things I’m guessing and he has a whole other bank account where he’s withdrawing hundreds of [British] pounds at a time.
With her suspicions confirmed, she took her kids and fled to her mother’s house.
At this point, Mumsnet users were invested in the drama, and gave their own two cents on the problem. User CauliflowerSqueeze offered her solidarity by writing that “all of us are collectively kicking his bollocks up his throat.” Others offered their support:Screenshot/Mumsnet
When her husband called to ask about that night’s dinner, she suggested that he “use his fancy other bank account to buy himself something nice.” Unsurprisingly, the man went off the handle when he realized his wife had discovered his secret life. She commented the update on the thread:
I hung up on him and he started calling and calling and when I didn’t pick up he rang my mother and obviously tried to make out I was having some kind of crisis. She was ice cold with him and said she’d seen it all with her own eyes and if he tried to come round she’d call the police.
The woman has transplanted her life and is struggling to stay strong. She explained her upbringing as one where:
[T]he man is the head of the house, the wife’s job is making a good home raising the children and keeping him happy while he provides. Divorce is a sin and will ruin your children’s lives.
Her ingrained mindset kept her from moving on and trying to be happy. Her loyal Mumsnet following reassured her, noting that “adultery certainly is [a sin]” as well.
In the meantime, the woman has begun the arduous process of divorce. While the months ahead won’t be easy, user Spartasprout commends her, writing, “You’ve been so brave OP, and if it all feels overwhelming just put one foot in front of the other, keep breathing, one day soon you’ll have such a different life without fear.”