Adam and Danielle Busby are the proud parents of six little girls. Along with 5-year-old Blayke, they have 2-year-old quintuplets, Ava, Olivia, Hazel, Riley, and Parker. All of the craziness involved in raising six daughters is documented in TLC’s original series, “OutDaughtered.”
In the first few episodes of Season Three, Adam and Danielle attempted to navigate potty training and disciplining while worrying about Hazel’s eye condition and making sure they have time for themselves. It has been wearing on Adam.
The dad of six admitted to Danielle in an earlier episode:
“I feel a lot of pressure being the only one providing for our family right now. All I think about all day long is seeing you, playing with the girls. I feel like I can’t give enough time to either side and make everyone happy. In return, I feel like I’m not happy.”
Danielle quickly noticed Adam’s change in behavior. She explained:
“I mean, in most situations, I feel like Adam should be happy, and so I don’t get it. I don’t know what’s going on.”
In an attempt to figure out whether there was anything she could do to help her husband feel better about everything, Danielle tried to get Adam to open up by talking with him.
However, Adam had a tough time explaining how he was feeling, saying that he was simply “in a funk” and that “it is what it is.”
Danielle told Adam that as parents of quintuplets, she’s not sure life is ever going to slow down for them. She said she wants to help him get out of his so-called funk but that she can’t help what she doesn’t know:
“It’s clear as day, and obvious, that something is wrong. The kids might not be aware of it, but I can see a difference. I feel it, I see it, you’re not the same person. I know it’s hard for you to talk about it, but it affects me. There should be no secrets between us.”
Adam eventually explained the way he was feeling as a “pounding weight in [his] chest.” He continued:
“It all of a sudden just, like, comes. I feel like I’ve never really had these types of feelings. It’s just hard in general for me to talk about that kind of stuff. I’ve had this notion in my head that people that can’t control their feelings or whatever are weak. It’s almost like I have this fear.
It’s been like this since the [quintuplets] were born. Up until this point, it’s almost like I hid from it, like, denied it.”
Danielle described Adam’s admission as both shocking and heartbreaking.
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These 6 beautiful souls bring me more joy than I could have ever dreamed would be possible. Sometimes I sit and wonder what God was thinking when he trusted me with this great responsibility as being Daddy to these girls. It's not always easy, but being a dad to girls we are responsible for setting the standard for the spouse that they will marry some day. Live every day to show them to love Jesus and to show them how much I love their mother @dbusby and that they should never settle for someone that will give them any less than that. #fathersday #bethestandard #outdaughtered
She added that she wants her husband to be happy and content with the life he is living and that it hurts that he didn’t feel comfortable coming to her to talk about it. She told him:
“I can understand that you are going through something and you don’t know what to do or you don’t know what to say … but you’ve got to talk to me because I’m your wife and I’m here, Adam. I’m here to talk to you or listen any time and do my best to try to understand.”
Adam told her that some days, he’s fine and happy. But other days, the weight of anxiety hits him, and he just can’t seem to snap out of it.
— Roger Pittman (@RogerPittman) July 19, 2017
— Adam Busby (@AdamBuzz) July 19, 2017
While postpartum depression is still more common in women, it can absolutely affect fathers as well.
Katherine Stone, founder of Postpartum Progress, explained to the Huffington Post back in 2015:
“I think maybe it’s still hard for people to understand that men can get postpartum depression because they don’t understand the underlying risk factors. It may be hard to understand from the standpoint of, ‘Well, if you didn’t have the baby, how can you have it?'”
According to Mayo Clinic, symptoms of postpartum depression include:
- Depressed mood or severe mood swings.
- Intense irritability and anger.
- Fear that you’re not a good parent.
- Severe anxiety and panic attacks.
- Recurrent thoughts of death or suicide and more.
In next week’s episode, Adam finally meets with someone to talk about his struggles. He hopes that by detailing his journey, he can help other men struggling through similar circumstances.