Gone are the days when marriage was viewed as a commitment for life, recent statistics suggest.

More couples are splitting up now than ever before, according to Amicable. The global divorce rate is at 44 percent, a 251 percent increase since 1960.

That means issues regarding the children from those couples are bound to arise too. At least, that’s the case for one mom from the United Kingdom.

A mother with a dilemma over her daughter’s surname took to Mumsnet, a popular parenting forum, asking advice about a controversial topic.

Kelly Sikkema/Unsplash

The mom, who goes by “BeanJen” online, wants to change her 1-year-old daughter’s last name to her maiden name, instead of her ex-husband’s. She wrote:

I’m just about to get divorced and my 1yr [dear daughter] has his surname. I’m planning to change mine back and I don’t see why she has to have a different name to me for the rest of her life, when her father has basically decided to leave us because we’re too much hassle.

BeanJen wrote that she doesn’t believe her ex is even interested in being a father, but knows she should ask him:

He has said to me he finds being a dad stressful and he wants to focus on himself. I’m sure though that he would be offended by the idea and I know I need his permission.

She believes a good solution might be putting their two names together, so that her daughter can have her name too. She wrote:

I was thinking double barrel our surnames (they would sound fine together) and then we’re both on there. Is this unreasonable? I know it’s just semantics, but I always dreamed of having a child and I love being a mum and I don’t see why I have to lose our family name connection because I married the wrong man.

Many commenters on the post told the mom to change her daughter’s name if she planned to be the primary caregiver. Others suggested that she hyphenate the child’s name.

In the UK, a mother or father needs permission from the other parent to change their child’s surname — unless the other parent isn’t involved in the child’s life at all.

Any changes to a child’s surname must be approved in court.

Do you think it’s fair to change her daughter’s last name?

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