Amy Betters-Midtvedt was distressed. The mother of five was at the grocery store with a cart loaded with groceries, but she couldn’t find her wallet.

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As one-half of the duo behind the blog “Hiding in the Closet with Coffee,” Betters-Midtvedt recounted that’s when her husband, Todd, showed up to save the day.

She wrote:

This is what your knight in shining armor looks like when you are in your 40’s.

While Betters-Midtvedt went on to describe the ways her husband’s love has manifested for her over the years — cleaning the kitchen without help, preparing the kids’ lunches and making sure mom if caffeinated — the blogger’s point wasn’t simply to highlight the acts of a wonderful father and husband.

Her point was that she recognized his devotedness years ago before she and her husband ever married. “And you guys,” she wrote of her happy marriage, “there were signs it would be this way so I have tips for you.”

hidingintheclosetwithcoffee/Instagram

According to Betters-Midtvedt, many of her husband’s kind gestures were evident when they were dating:

In college this love looked like boyfriend Todd running to the store for a danish I was craving or watching me and my friends on the dance floor long after he wanted to leave the bar or him being known across campus by the flower backpack he was carrying which of course was mine.

In light of the simplicity of her husband’s actions back then, Betters-Midtvedt asked young people not to be deceived by “showy” or artificial displays of affection created for likes and shares on social media:

Do not be fooled by big, showy promposals and giant cards with candy bars glued to them with some cute saying or by your name spelled in pepperoni by a boy who’s asking you to homecoming.

More often than not, Betters-Midtvedt warned, the moment is fleeting and likely orchestrated with a little extra help behind the scenes:

That isn’t the stuff that lasts and let’s be honest…moms are totally helping them with those things.

hidingintheclosetwithcoffee/Instagram

Betters-Midtvedt urged young people to look for sincerity instead of flash and, above all, to notice how a significant other treats them when the camera is pointing in the other direction:

Watch how he treats you when Instagram isn’t looking.

When it comes down to it, choose the man carrying the flowery backpack in public “because he will also be the man who bails you out at ALDI’s when you’re 40-? with a smile and a hug”:

And that my friends is true love.

Even better, Betters-Midtvedt said her husband wasn’t angry about having to leave work to pay for the family’s groceries. In fact, he reminded her it was actually his turn to do the shopping.

“Young people,” she wrote, “this is what love looks like when you’re old and it’s ridiculous how awesome it is.”

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