A new father took to Reddit to question whether or not he was being negligent in his parenting responsibilities — and he got a slew of different responses.
The Reddit user said he told his wife that he won’t help take care of their twins overnight because he works and she doesn’t. He explained:
Wife and I just had twins 3 weeks ago. I work while she does not. I help whenever I’m not working but have told my wife she has to cover the overnights as I need sleep for work.
He later added that he works “72-84 hours per week, 12 hour shifts.” But his wife doesn’t feel that means he shouldn’t help at night, the dad said:
She thinks it’s unfair however she can take two hour naps while they sleep while i can’t do that at my job. We even have a nanny that was here 4 out of 5 work days this week. I’m up early on the weekends and take care of them while she sleeps in.
The dad said that the nanny is their housekeeper, who helps the mother most days, and that he assists when he gets off work. He concluded:
I’m not trying to get out of doing my part but [Am I the A**hole?]
Many Reddit users suggested that the dad should have thought about the care that goes into raising kids before having them.
One commenter said he was in the wrong:
[You’re the a**hole]. Getting up at night is an inevitable part of parenting. You signed up for this when you had kiddos.
Others defended the dad and said that the mother needs to step up. A commenter said:
Most people about the topic seem to read only the headline. You are the only one working and you have a nanny. She has to step up.
Many commenters also suggested that the mother is likely still recovering from childbirth if she had twins and that the father should be mindful of that.
Do you think the father should have to help out overnight? Let us know in the comments.